Friday, September 02, 2011

Texas Tall Tales

Now I didn't write this but I found it funny enough to share. It came from some family of mine that lives in Midland/Odessa TX and since my Husband grew up there I thought I would preserve a bit of our heritage. Enjoy! 
The Great Midland Flood of 2011
(Midland, TX, Aug. 12, 2011) The city of Midland yesterday received one of the most remarkable and devastating weather events in the history of Texas.
In a mere 37 minutes, from 5:24 PM to 6:01 PM, Midland International Airport recorded more than twice the total amount of rain than had fallen during the previous 319 days, dating back to September 26, 2010.
Police officers reported that it was like a “wall of water” had descended upon the city. The water mixed with the nearly year’s worth of oil that had collected on roadways to make rush-hour travel nearly impossible.
One driver reportedly saw a stop sign too late and tried to slam on his brakes, only to end up in Odessa.
Cattle, who for several months had taken refuge from the drought and heat in giant cracks in the ground, were swallowed up whole by the Earth as the soil suddenly absorbed all the moisture and closed in over their heads. Rescuers, trained in Alpine avalanches, were going from ranch to ranch listening for distant mooing sounds.
Meanwhile, panicked young rattlesnakes took refuge in the branches of nearby mesquite trees.
In one especially hard-hit neighborhood, volunteers were going door-to-door in rubber boots looking for people needing assistance.
Two persons have been hospitalized so far. One, a 23-year-old woman, was standing on a street corner when the rain began. The driver of a nearby car attempted to activate his windshield wipers, and pieces of dried, brittle rubber flew off and struck her in the left eye.
The other injury was to a 47-year-old man who sprained his ankle while dancing.
John Nielsen-Gammon, the Texas State Climatologist, said that the 0.36″ of rain Midland received in 37 minutes yesterday was still not sufficient to break the drought.
“It’s a very good start,” he said. “And the additional hundredth Midland received an hour later was really the icing on the cake. Just twenty-two more flooding events like this one, and Midland will be back up to normal precipitation for the year.”
[Editor's note: the rainfall statistics in this story are accurate. Everything else is merely plausible.]